IT'S GREAT TO BE A MAN, BECAUSE......
> You can get in & out of your 4 x 4 . Easily
> Your ass is never a factor in a job interview.
> Your orgasms are real. Always.
> Your last name stays put.
> You never feel compelled to stop a friend from getting laid.
> Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.
> The garage is all yours.
> Wedding plans take care of themselves.
> Chocolate is just another snack.
> You can be president.
> You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
> Car mechanics tell you the truth.
> You don't give a rats ass if someone notices your new haircut.
> If you retain water, it's in a canteen.
> Porn movies are designed with you in mind.
> You can open all your own jars.
> You never have to drive to another gas station because this one's just too
> The only ladder you have is on the roof rack.
> The mud goes on your truck not your face.
> Same work...more pay.
> Wrinkles add character.
> Wedding Dress $5,000; Tux rental $100.
> People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
> New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
> One mood, ALL the damn time.
> Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
> A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
> You can leave the motel bed unmade.
> You can kill your own food.
> You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
> If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your
> Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
> You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger seat.
> Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
> You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours without ever
> thinking: "He must be mad at me."
> You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.
> If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might
> become lifelong friends.
> You're not expected to know the names of more than five colors.
> You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
> You almost never have strap problems in public.
> You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
> The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
> You don't have to shave below your neck.
> One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.
> You can do your nails with a pocketknife.
> You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
> Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25 relatives, December 24th, in
> 45 minutes.
> The world is your urinal