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Thread: Rectum Stretcher
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09-11-2005, 08:27 PM #1
Professional Member
- Join Date
- May 2005
- Posts
- 445
>
> Rectum Stretcher....
> > >
> > > While she was "flying" down the road yesterday (10
miles over the
> > limit), a
> > > woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun
on the
> > other
> > > side lying in wait. The cop pulled her over, walked up to the
car, and
> > with
> > > that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked,
"What's
> your
> > > hurry?"
> > >
> > > To which she replied, "I'm late for work."
> > >
> > > "Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you
do?"
> > >
> > > "I'm a rectum stretcher," she responded.
> > >
> > > The cop stammered, "A what? A rectum stretcher? And just
what does a
> > rectum
> > > stretcher do?"
> > >
> > > "Well," she said, "I start by inserting one
finger, then work my way
> up
> > to
> > > two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in.
I work
> > from
> > > side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly
but
> surely
> > > stretch, until it's about 6 feet wide."
> > >
> > > "And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot
*******?" he asked.
> > >
> > > "You give him a radar gun and park him behind a
bridge..."
> > >
> > > Traffic Ticket. $95.00
> Court Costs $45.00
> The Look on Cop's Face. PRICELESS
A lack of planning on your part does not constitute a state of emergency on my part.
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09-16-2005, 07:39 PM #2
While she was "flying" down the road yesterday (10
miles over the limit), a woman passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun on the other side lying in wait. The cop pulled her over, walked up to the car, and with that classic patronizing smirk we all know and love, asked, "What's your hurry?"
To which she replied, "I'm late for work."
"Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"
"I'm a rectum stretcher," she responded.
The cop stammered, "A what? A rectum stretcher? And just
what does a rectum stretcher do?"
"Well," she said, "I start by inserting one finger, then work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then with my whole hand in. I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch, until it's about 6 feet wide."
"And just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot *******?" he asked.
"You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge..."
Traffic Ticket. $95.00
Court Costs $45.00
The Look on Cop's Face. PRICELESS
Government is a disease......masquerading as its own cureEcclesiastes 10:2 NIV


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