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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Kingston Ontario Canada
    Posts
    1,210

    The Newfie & the gorilla

    A small zoo in Toronto obtained a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle.

    Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was in season. To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available. Thinking about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of Garge, a Newfoundland part-time worker responsible for cleaning the animal cages.

    Garge, like most newfs, liked to drink Screech but also possessed ample ability to satisfy a female of any species. The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution. Garge was approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla for $500.00? Garge showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully. The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer, but only under five conditions.

    1. "First", Garge said, "I ain't gonna kiss her on the lips."
    The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition.

    2. "Second", he said, "You can't never tell no one about this."
    The Keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

    3. "Third", Garge said, "I want all the children raised Catholic." Once again it was agreed.

    4. "Fourth", Garge said "I needs a 40 ouncer of Screech, before I starts" Happily, the keeper said yes.


    5. And last of all, Garge stated "You gotta give me another week to come up with the $500.00."

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    203
    like it

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    S.E. Pa
    Posts
    6,161

    Talking

    Thornton, I've said it before but I really worry about you....

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Kingston Ontario Canada
    Posts
    1,210
    Quote Originally Posted by hearthman View Post
    Thornton, I've said it before but I really worry about you....
    Thank-you, hearthman. it's nice to know someone worries about me.!!!!!http://hvac-talk.com/vbb/images/smilies/biggrin.gif

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    Ontario, Canada
    Posts
    1,029
    thorton, did you used to work at dupont? were you in the maintenance?
    Parts Changer Extraordinaire
    ------------------------------------------------------
    Have tools and gauges, will travel.

    RIDGID|YELLOW JACKET|UEI|TESTO|STANLEY|CPS|VETO| KLEIN|MILWAUKEE|MASTERCRAFT|

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Kingston Ontario Canada
    Posts
    1,210
    Quote Originally Posted by blitz View Post
    thorton, did you used to work at dupont? were you in the maintenance?
    No, I never worked at Dupont?

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    Ontario, Canada
    Posts
    1,029
    ah nvm then ur profile said u were textile worker. I was thinking there;s only on in kingston, which is dupont.... I grew up in kingston.
    Parts Changer Extraordinaire
    ------------------------------------------------------
    Have tools and gauges, will travel.

    RIDGID|YELLOW JACKET|UEI|TESTO|STANLEY|CPS|VETO| KLEIN|MILWAUKEE|MASTERCRAFT|

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Perth, Australia
    Posts
    514
    I will certainly be passing this one along to the Newfies I know! Thanks.
    "Who am I? I'm the unsilent majority big mouth!" - (Paulie in Rocky 4)

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