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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Los Angeles, CALIFA
    Posts
    1,134
    When the doctor says: "One of several things could cause your symptoms."
    What the doctor means: "I haven't the foggiest idea what's wrong with you."

    When the doctor says: "Are you certain you haven't had this before?"
    What the doctor means: "Because now you've got it again."

    When the doctor says: "I'd like to run that last test over."
    What the doctor means: "The lab lost your sample."

    When the doctor says: "This prescription has a few side effects."
    What the doctor means: "You may experience sudden hair growth on your palms."

    When the doctor says: "Your insurance should cover most of this."
    What the doctor means: "You'll have to sell your house to cover the rest."

    When the doctor says: "Let's go over your symptoms once more."
    What the doctor means: "I can't remember who you are."

    When the doctor says: "How long have you had these symptoms?"
    What the doctor means: "How do you feel about living with them the rest of your life?"

    When the doctor says: "It looks like bursitis."
    What the doctor means: "Does the name "Quasimodo" ring a bell?"

    When the doctor says: "This won't hurt much."
    What the doctor means: "Did you bring a bullet to bite?"

    When the doctor says: "There's a lot of this going around."
    What the doctor means: "And we'll give it a name as soon as we figure out what it is."

    When the doctor says: "We'll just remove this ingrown toenail."
    What the doctor means: "A cane and orthopedic shoes should help."
    Do as I say, not as I do

  2. #2
    When a doctor says, "You feel some discomfort."
    What he means is, "This is going to hurt like hell"

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