-I have to think it over.
=No way are you getting this job, but thanks for the free engineering and ideas.
-I'm a little tight right now.
=I can afford food, cable TV, beer, cigs and going out to dinner but not to pay you, tough luck.
-This didn't work right since the last time you worked on it.
=But that was like 2 years ago, and it was a piece of junk then but still give me that free warranty repair.
-It was acting up the other day.
=But I waited till 4pm Friday to call ya just to ruin your weekend.
-I thought you said this was a good brand.
=You do make them in your garage don't you.
-I can buy that same thing at Home Cheapo for a lot less.
=But I have no idea how to put it in and am too busy doing important things like bothering you.
-Just make it last one more year.
=For the next 10 years.
-I am moving so tape it or glue it back together.
=And put your sticker on it so the new owner knows who screwed him.
-I was gonna fix it myself but I am too busy.
=Besides, I have trouble changing light bulbs.
-Are you guys looking for any help?
=If you hire me you must be desperate and stupid, and I like working for companies like that, matter of fact they are the only ones who ever hire me.
-The check is in the mail.
=See... I'm a little tight right now.
-How long will this take?
=You charge by the hour huh.
-What temperature should I set the thermostat on?
=If I were you I would change my phone number asap.
-It needs a shot of freeeezone.
=Or antitfreeze or coolant or whatever the hell ya call it, either way it I know it ain't major......see make it last one more year.
-The other company charged a lot less and were only here 15 minutes.
=His station wagon had minimal rust on it too.
-It worked good like that for years.
=Don't try to drum up work on my perfectly good 28 year old Janitrol.
-I am gonna report you to the better biz bureau.
=I have them on speed dial.
-My cousin is in the biz.
=I would call him but I owe him money from the last side job he did for me.
-My uncle is in the biz.
=See....my cousin is in the biz.
-My neighbor is in the biz.
=See.......my uncle is in the biz.
-If I had the tools I would go into biz too.
=Soon as the monkeys quit flying out of my butt.