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  1. #14
    double post

    [Edited by Boiling Point on 06-18-2004 at 10:15 AM]

  2. #15
    Originally posted by Steve Wiggins
    The sign of a good parent is when the kids don't ever want to move. If your kids can't wait to get out of the house at 18 then what did you do wrong?
    How wrong some can be - some of the kids that dont want to move out are lazy or on drugs or did not get self esteem as a child and feel that they can not do it. There are many factors in the development of children - just because your kid cant wait to turn 18 and get the hell out does not mean you screwed up. Hell I said it when was a kid, bet there are quite a few on this site that have, and realized quickly how lucky I was. I get amazed how people can spew out a response like this - do you know anything about this family?? Perhaps they are a strong individual type that needs to be on there own and experience life. So when a kid turns 18 and runs to the recruiting office does that mean his parent screwed up?? The sign of a good parent is a strong, individual, focused, caring, loving, supportive child - not one that mooches off the folks until 30.

    But this is one mans opinion who moved out at 19 and loves his parent very much and they did nothing wrong - unless you count getting me into this trade from auto mechanics.

  3. #16
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Location
    NJ
    Posts
    1,214
    My personal experience is that poverty and hunger were a greater motivator than my parents ever were. 26 and no drivers license? Why would you risk your insurance like that? Anyway sounds like it may be time to wean him off the tit. Shoulda fired him right the first time shielding a person/family member from failure does not help them although it hurts to see them suffer. I appreciate my good friends today ...they are the ones that stab me in the front.
    thehumid1-------I live in NJ, a state where it's free to come in but you have to pay to leave!

  4. #17
    Originally posted by Steve Wiggins
    The sign of a good parent is when the kids don't ever want to move. If your kids can't wait to get out of the house at 18 then what did you do wrong?
    Why am I not shocked by your statement ... With mentality such as this, it's no wonder the world has problems.. Steve your a work art...

    [Edited by AllTemp on 06-18-2004 at 05:06 PM]
    AllTemp Heating & Cooling

  5. #18
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    SC
    Posts
    20,677
    Originally posted by Steve Wiggins
    The sign of a good parent is when the kids don't ever want to move. If your kids can't wait to get out of the house at 18 then what did you do wrong?
    ================================================== ==========

    I see by your signature and post that the Wizard of Oz must be your family counsellor. Kids who want to stay at home after 18 have been taught to be lazy and count on others to do what you're supposed to do.
    No reserve. No retreat. No regrets.

    For those who have fought for it, freedom has a sweetness the protected will never know.

    http://www.airwarvietnam.com/16thSOSGunners2.jpg

    Proud member of KA Club

  6. #19
    The ideal parent should make himself/herself progressively less necessary

  7. #20
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Posts
    9,871
    Originally posted by Steve Wiggins
    The sign of a good parent is when the kids don't ever want to move. If your kids can't wait to get out of the house at 18 then what did you do wrong?
    Steve, your just a freak and you always will be a freak!!

  8. #21
    Join Date
    Dec 2000
    Location
    Victorville Ca
    Posts
    4,660
    I so agree the bottom line is my son is just plan lazy. we as parrents just did not instill that work ethic that we have I just thought it would rubb off

  9. #22
    Join Date
    Jun 2001
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    12,077
    My old man wouldn't blink, lose a wink of sleep over me not pulling my weight in any aspect of my life. It did not matter what it was. And my mother was worse.

    As a father and a hub and a dude trying to make a living in today's wolrd these days, I can't tell you how gratefull I am for there firm and disciplined rearing they provided me with.

    What the hell are you thinking to even mull this over and even come close to feeling bad. He'll never become a man with this sort of wussy foot sort of take to him..

    And I also agree with the US Military option HVAC 45 mentioned. Best thing for any young man.

  10. #23
    Join Date
    Aug 2001
    Location
    forney texas
    Posts
    17,890
    Since he propably has insider knowledge on what the job costs were and what you paid him and how much you stuffed in your pocket he is more than likely resentfull. Heck give him a raise, you can't take it with you when you die. better yet motivate him. Give him the next install and the money but have him pay you 60.00 bucks an hour for every hour it takes to install the equipment. I'd bet his install time drops dramatically.

  11. #24
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    Midwest
    Posts
    9,937
    I have a son who sounds identical to yours. I also tried unsuccessfully to have him become a part of the business, but his alarm clock just wouldn't go off or other bizarre things happened on a daily basis, so it just didn't work out. He *never* runs out of excuses. Some unfortunate, untimely obstacle always seems to keep him from accomplishing anything. Everything is just beyond his reach.

    Year after year, I kept telling myself he'd mature and become responsible. He's 31 and it hasn't happened yet. He likes those *BIG* speakers in his vehicles too

  12. #25
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Posts
    1,311
    F%^& me once, shame on you. F%^& me twice, shame on me. family or not, sometimes you have to jump the ship if it's sinking.

    oh yeah to the guy that says kids who run out of the house at 18 are children of poor parenting. well i say to that, i left home as soon as i hit 18 and i very quickly found out that my father buthead that he may be was right about most of the stuf he said even though it was smothered with assorted b.s., my brother did the same but he only lasted about two months and ran back home and still there today at 26. children leave when they leave, for whatever the reason, period. and at some point you must remove the mothers tit from their mouth and make them grow up, some just don't do it on their own.


    .

  13. #26
    Join Date
    Jun 2004
    Location
    s.c.
    Posts
    287
    well it seems we have some fine parents on here, you did the right thing & your wife is just being a mom. Its a a tough job but if you dont cut those strings & make him stand up (even fall a few times) & be a man now, where will he be when you're gone? kudo's for a job well done , I know that was hard.
    I can do all things...

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