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Thread: METAPHORS

  1. #53
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    yadkinville nc
    Posts
    532
    Happy as a puppy with two peckers

    Happy as a queer in boys town

    Shaking like a blind queer at a wienee roast I have no idea what that means but my old man used to say it.

    screwed up as a football bat.
    duct tape and cable ties will fix anything, if that don't work add a 90-340.

  2. #54
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    lovley downtown central new jersey
    Posts
    62
    He's tighter then a calms a$$ .
    He's so full of sh!t his breath is bad and his eyes are brown .
    Dummer then a stump.
    He's almost as smart as stupid .
    Can get lost going crazy.

  3. #55
    Join Date
    Nov 2001
    Location
    Seattle, WA
    Posts
    7,819
    Nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rockers.
    "The American Republic will endure until the day Congress discovers it can bribe the public with the public's own money.
    - Alexis de Toqueville, 1835

  4. #56
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    madison wi
    Posts
    139
    she is runnin like a raped date

  5. #57
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Location
    Howell, Michigan
    Posts
    147

    Hmm

    mEANING A BAD WORK ETHIC( QUIT DICKIN THE DOG)

  6. #58
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    East of Lyndon's
    Posts
    525

    Talking More

    How about.......

    That went over like a ruptured pole vaulter.

    A casserole short of a potluck

    The lights are on but nobody's home.

    As smart as a pet porcupine in a balloon factory.

    If your brains were set on the edge of a razor blade, it would
    be like a pea rolling off a 4-lane highway.

    If your brains were dynamite, you wouldn't have enough to blow to
    blow your nose.

    If your brains were gas, you wouldn't have enough to power a ant's
    go-cart around a Cheerio.

    It never pays to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.

    If you had any brains, you'd be dangerous!

    Fix the problem, not the blame!

    A fool and his money are easily parted, but how did the fool get the money
    in the first place?

    And... for those Walmartians in sweat pants..... She looks like two hippos
    fighting under a tent!!!!


  7. #59
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Sanborn, IA
    Posts
    191
    Hornier than a 3 balled tom-cat.
    Worthless as tits on a chicken.

  8. #60
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    SE Kansas
    Posts
    33
    From a car salesman:
    Deal of the day
    Bring your money and your wife
    And we'll dicker

  9. #61
    Join Date
    Jul 2002
    Location
    37760
    Posts
    420
    happier than a coon in a corn patch
    sore as a risun

  10. #62
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    middle tn
    Posts
    21
    (she/he) so ugly, you could beat (her/him) with an ugly stick and no one would notice.

    he's so tight he beats his money, like a pimp beats a whore, so it works harder.

    shes so ugly you'd have to put a bag over your head, in case hers comes off.

    if he had any brains he'd be dangerous.

    do those dark roots mean you have brain damage (actually heard a kid ask a woman that, when i was strollin around in wally world one night. she got on to him for somethin, he shut her up with that retort.)



  11. #63
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    51
    Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.

  12. #64
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    SW MO.
    Posts
    5,219
    can't beat that with a limp d!ck.
    Discipline your child so that other parents don't have to.

    We're awl pawthetic and kweepy and can't get giwrls. That's why we fight wobots.

  13. #65
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    Nashville tn
    Posts
    21
    Colder than a witches titty in a brass bra. Hotter than a 4balled Tom cat. Bright as a burnt out light blub

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