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Thread: METAPHORS

  1. #66
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    East of Lyndon's
    Posts
    525

    Hmm

    The wheel is spinning but the hamster is dead
    If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.

  2. #67
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Spud Country
    Posts
    326
    Your as worthless as tits on a boar hog.
    I am an experienced, caring, trusted, service provider who solves my customers issues beyond there expectations by educating them and guiding them with value-building options to make excellent buying decisions while building security and wealth for my company, myself and my family.

  3. #68
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Posts
    4

    Thumbs up

    His breath smells like a bag full of french fried dragon *******s!

  4. #69
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    A land down under
    Posts
    306
    Some Aussie favorites

    How you going - I'm flat out like a lizard drinking, off like the brides pants, You can only blow it up once

  5. #70
    Join Date
    Jan 2002
    Location
    New Hampshire
    Posts
    1,285
    She walks like two bobcats in a burlap bag, but she ain't worth a pinch of coonshi+...

  6. #71
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Louisiana
    Posts
    200
    "Turn your hat around, i wanna see you headed back." "That boy couldn't pour piss out of a boot with directions on the heel." "Can't never could, and was never did." "Accurate to a knats ass."

  7. #72
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    Location
    maroon lazyboy
    Posts
    1,044

    I needed a good laugh, and this thread is killing me!!!

    its better to burp, and taste it, than to fart, and waste it.

  8. #73
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    East of Lyndon's
    Posts
    525

    Hmm

    Quote Originally Posted by evankoehn View Post
    its better to burp, and taste it, than to fart, and waste it.
    Surely you remember, "Better to belch and bear the shame, than to squelch the belch and bear the pain!


    Life is like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today might burn your ass tomorrow. (I stole that from someone's tagline!!)
    If you can't fix it with a hammer, you've got an electrical problem.

  9. #74
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    St Pete, FL
    Posts
    76
    Quote Originally Posted by Wendo View Post
    Life is like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today might burn your ass tomorrow. (I stole that from someone's tagline!!)


    I've been to two goat ropings and a county fair and ain't seen one that good.

  10. #75
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    S.C.
    Posts
    931
    saw this in a rest room at an auto repair shop- here I sit broken hearted, sat down to s#)t but only farted!

    on an old tombstone with the name "Jesse James" died in like 1890-
    Remember friends as you pass by,
    as you are now so once was I.
    As I am now, soon you will be.
    Prepare for death and follow me!

    and of course-
    What the eyes don't see,
    The heart won't grieve!
    It's refreshing to pull your head out of the box when servicing a system.

  11. #76
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Hendersonville,NC
    Posts
    84
    dumber than a bag of hammers,hard as a brick bat,if a hairlips the pope (not sure what that one means though) tighter than Dicks hatband, a crooked as a dogs hindleg I'll think of more I'm sure

  12. #77
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Montgomery, NY
    Posts
    228
    You don't have to be a proctologist to recognize an a**hole.
    The best part of him/her ran down his mothers leg.
    His/her mother should have swallowed that.
    He/she is a poster child for birth control.
    My ex wife ran off with a cop and I thought he was trying to give her back, that's why I didn't stop officer.
    Don't flip her ***** switch.
    Better pissed off than pissed on, unless you are into that stuff.
    Horny as a two peckered billy-goat.
    Nothing is impossible it is only limited by the depth of your wallet.
    If you think I'm an a**hole, you really should meet my boss.
    WE LIVE IN THE LAND OF THE FREE,
    ONLY BECAUSE OF THE BRAVE

  13. #78
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Spud Country
    Posts
    326
    You are as handy as a pocket on a shirt.
    I am an experienced, caring, trusted, service provider who solves my customers issues beyond there expectations by educating them and guiding them with value-building options to make excellent buying decisions while building security and wealth for my company, myself and my family.

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