A big city California lawyer went duck hunting in rural Texas. He shot and dropped a bird, but, it fell into a farmers field on the other side of a fence.
As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on a tractor and asked what he was doing.
The lawyer responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field and now I am going to get it."
The old farmer replied, "This is my property and you are not coming over here."
The indignant lawyer responded, "I am one of the best lawyers in the country and if you don't let me get that duck, I will sue you and take everything you own."
The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we do things in Texas. We settle small disagreements like this with the Texas Three Kick rule."
The lawyer asked, "What is this Texas Three Kick rule?"
The farmer replied, "Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up."
The lawyer quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old coot. He agreed to abide by the local custom.
The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the city fellar. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot in the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick nearly ripped the man's nose off of his face. The barrister was flat on his belly when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to give up.
The lawyer summoned every bit of this will and managed to get to his feet and said, "Okay, you old fart, now it's my turn!"
The sly old farmer smiled and said, "NAW, I GIVE UP!"
"You can have the duck."