2 blonde jokes

[Tommy1010]

A blonde is on a plane headed toward Toronto. During the flight she decides to get up from her coach seat and sits in first class. The stewardess approaches and says " Im sorry maam but these seats are reserved for first class patrons, you'll have to return to your seat" ..the blonde simply says, "Im blonde , Im beautiful, and Im headed to Toronto".

The stewardess tells the co-pilot. The co-pilot approaches the woman and says," Maam, this section is for first class only. Please go back your seat now" The blonde simply says," Im blonde, Im beautiful, and im headed to Toronto".

Finally the head pilot tells the co-pilot and stewardess. "My wife is a blonde, I speak their language, I'll handle this."

The pilot whispers something in the blondes ear, and she says.."oh my God, Im sorry and thank you!"

The co-pilot and stewardess ask what did he tell this woman to change her mind???

The pilot said...'"I just told her first class isn't going to Toronto!!!"
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A blonde locks her keys in her car. As she tries to open the door with a hanger, a man approaches and says "do you need help?"

As he looks into the car, he approaches the other side and opens the passenger door and says "Miss, this doors open!!"

The blonde says...."Duh, I already got that one!!!!!!!!!!"

[Camilla]

LOL. funny one. seems nobody gets tired of these dumb blonde jokes.

[Bladeforger]

LOL. funny one. seems nobody gets tired of these dumb blonde jokes.

That's because most of the apparent blondes aren't really blonde--some of them have gray roots, some of them have brunette roots, you get the idea. I'm married to a hair stylist, and she can sit in a restaurant and spot the 2 to 4 real, natural blondes who aren't using color. It's pretty funny sometimes.

[truckinu]

Gotta love those Blondes!

[stebs]

Got one for you, true story to boot....

One of the construction managers at our local high school was leaving one afternoon after school got out. The parking lot was empty by then, except for one car with a girl next to it crying. He went over and asked what was wrong. She told him that she couldnt get into her car because the battery in her remote was dead and she couldnt unlock the door. She then asked him if he could take her to get a new battery for her remote. He then asks her if she had the car key on the same ring as her remote. She said yes. He then asked her if she had tried using the key in the door to get in, and she hadn't.

She didnt realize that her key not only started her car, but would also unlock the doors.

I about fell over laughing when he got to the end of telling me that story...

[Tommy1010]

LMAO.....a blondes on one side of a river and a brunettes on the other. The brunette yells to the blonde, " Hey, how do I get to the other side?".....the blonde replied, " OMG..DUUUHHHH, your already ON the other side!!"

[poison202]

A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.
The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black. The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes. Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red. Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time. To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes. The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?" The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says, "That's not a TV -- it's a microwave

[GrumpyGrizzly]

Brunette, redhead, and a blonde are in the doctors office.

The brunette says "My boyfriend was on top, we're having a baby boy."

The redhead says "My husband was on the bottom, we're having a baby girl."

The blonde starts crying uncontrollably and the other ladies ask "What's wrong sweetie, is everything ok??"

The blonde says "I'm having puppies!"

[Home&Marine]

You guys are Quacking me Up!

[RoBoTeq]

That's because most of the apparent blondes aren't really blonde--some of them have gray roots, some of them have brunette roots, you get the idea. I'm married to a hair stylist, and she can sit in a restaurant and spot the 2 to 4 real, natural blondes who aren't using color. It's pretty funny sometimes.

I can tell the naturals too, if they are wearing short skirts with no undies.

[rayr]

I can tell the naturals too, if they are wearing short skirts with no undies.

Hey Robin, what if the Lawn has been mowed???

[RoBoTeq]

Hey Robin, what if the Lawn has been mowed???

That is a disgusting trend that I will never understand. If that is the case, they are not worthy of my wandering eyes.
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This is cute;





This is not;
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[HoneyDo]

How do you turn a dishwasher into a snow shoveler?

give her a shovel...

[RoBoTeq]

How do you turn a dishwasher into a snow shoveler?

give her a shovel...

Oh yea! General women jokes.

How many men does it take to clean a toilet?
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NONE! That's a woman's job!

[jhallinstaller]

a guy walks into a bar,sits down and reads a sign on the wall "free BEER for a year if you pass the test". the guy calls the barkeep and ask about the "test".

the bar guy tells him he has to accomplish 3 things drinking a gallon of pepper tequila with out stopping , then go out back and pull the sore tooth from his pet gator, and the lady up stairs is 34 she's never had sex you gotta make things right. the man declines ... an hour and 8 shots later he say barkeep where's that tequila,, drinks it in 2 seconds ,stumbles out back as everyone sat listening to the grunts growls,and banging on the wall suddenly no sounds and when the barkeep was getting ready to check on the guy ... he opens the door and say's
"hey! pal where's the woman with the sore tooth"............