A man shows up at work one Monday with 2 black eyes. His co-workers asked how it happened;
"I got 'em at Church Sunday"
"At Church?? How'd that happen?"
"Well we stood up to sing and this big fat gal in the pew in front of me had her dress caught in the crack of her a**. So I reached up and pulled it out. She turned around a hit me in my left eye."
"That explainsd the left eye. How'd you get the rigt eye?"
Well when she hit me for pulling it out....I put it back"