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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Kingston Ontario Canada
    Posts
    1,210

    Summer Classes For Men

    A lady friend sent me this and I thought I would share??? thorton.....


    THE
    ADULT LEARNING CENTER

    REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED
    By Friday, June 29th 2009

    NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
    OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM


    Class 1
    How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays--Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
    Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
    Class 2
    The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself?
    Round Table Discussion.
    Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.
    Class 3
    Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice.
    Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.
    Class 4
    Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
    Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.
    Class 5
    Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
    Examples on Video.
    Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
    At 7:00 PM
    Class 6
    Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
    Help Line Support and Support Groups.
    Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM
    Class 7
    Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
    Open Forum
    Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.
    Class 8
    Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
    Graphics and Audio Tapes.
    Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.
    Class 9
    Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials.
    Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined
    Class 10
    Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
    Driving Simulations.
    4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.
    Class 11
    Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
    Online Classes and role-playing
    Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined
    Class 12
    How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
    Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
    Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
    Class 13
    How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Rememberin g Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.
    Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
    Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.
    Class 14
    The Stove/Oven-- What It Is and How It Is Used.
    Live Demonstration.
    Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.
    Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Location
    in a house, Appomattox, Va.
    Posts
    3,293
    class 1: you don't put ice in beer
    class 2: over not under
    class 3: go in shower, fixes #2 problem as well
    class 5: they can certainly fly at your head....
    class 10: not w/o the seat belt holding you in
    class 11: she lives there, you live here
    class 12: is that operation reversible?
    class 14: cooks food/dries boots, used by wife
    Col 3:23


    questions asked, answers received, ignorance abated

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