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Thread: men vs. women

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
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    men vs. women

    The Difference Between Women And Men

    1. NAMES
    If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara.

    If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.

    When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw in a $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller, and none will actually admit they want change back.

    When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

    3. MONEY

    A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

    A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need, but it's on sale.

    A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream,
    razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Marriott.

    The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337.
    A man would not be able to identify most of these items.

    A woman has the last word in any argument.

    Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

    6. CATS
    Women love cats.

    Men say they love cats, but, when women aren't looking, men kick cats.

    7. FUTURE
    A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

    A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

    8. SUCCESS

    A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

    A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

    A woman marries a man, expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

    A man marries a woman, expecting that she won't change, and she does.

    A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage,
    answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.

    A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

    11. NATURAL
    Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.

    Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

    Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.

    A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Hangin out with you losers
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    Why do you never buy a women a watch?

    Because there is a clock on the stove (or microwave if its my house)
    I remember my first day,It was fun!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
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    And men just buy cel phones...or blackberries

    Anything is possible with God

    Fortunately I keep my feathers numbered for just such an emergency - F. Leghorn

    Ain't I a stinker - B. Bunny

    \m/ (>.<) \m/ ROCK HARD!!

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