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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Oregon
    Posts
    525

    Headlines from the year 2029

    * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

    HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR:

    2029

    Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California. White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

    Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.

    Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.

    Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

    Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the AmericanTerritory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iraq, Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon).

    Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

    France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica.

    Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

    George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

    Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

    85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.

    Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

    Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

    Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

    Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

    Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.

    New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.

    Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.

    IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

    Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.

    Now, send this to whoever you want to and as many as you want and guess what....NOTHING will happen. No miracles, no money, absolutely nothing, except you might make someone smile

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    MEDIA PA
    Posts
    1,385

    How

    true it all my be . Don't think i'll be aropund to see

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
    Location
    omaha
    Posts
    343

    Talking

    whats the price for agallon of gas

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Virginia, near the coast
    Posts
    1,177
    Quote Originally Posted by johncavh View Post
    whats the price for agallon of gas
    If you have to ask, you can't afford it.
    It's a mechanical device, designed by humans, built by humans and operated by humans. What could possibly go wrong?

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