>A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later....
> >"Da-ad...."
> >"What?"
> >"I'm thirsty. Can you bring drink of water?"
> >"No. You had your chance. Lights out."
> >Five minutes later: "Da-aaaad....."
> >"WHAT?"
> >"I'm THIRSTY. Can I have a drink of water??"
> >"I told you NO!" If you ask again, I'll have to spank you!!"
> >Five minutes later......"Daaaa-aaaad....."
> >"WHAT!"
> >"When you come in to spank me, can you bring a drink of water?"
> >
>
>---------------------------------------------------------------------------
> -
> >
> >An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief,
finally
> >asked him, "How do you expect to get into Heaven?" The boy thought it
> over
> >and said, "Well, I'll run in and out and in and out and keep slamming the
> >door until St. Peter says, "For Heaven's sake, Dylan, come in or stay
> >out!'"
> >
>
>---------------------------------------------------------------------------
> -
> >
> >One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her
> >son into bed.
> >She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his
> >voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?" The mother smiled and
gave
> >him a reassuring hug. "I can't dear," she said. "I have to sleep in
> Daddy's
> >room." A long silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice: "The
> >big sissy."
> >
>
>---------------------------------------------------------------------------
> -
> >
> >When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three year old
came
> >into the room when I was just getting ready to get into the shower. She
> >said, "Mommy, you are getting fat!" I replied, "Yes, honey, remember
Mommy
> >has a baby growing in her tummy."
> >"I know," she replied, but what's growing in your butt?"
> >
>
>---------------------------------------------------------------------------
> -
> >
> >A little boy was doing his math homework. He said to himself, "Two plus
> >five, that son of a ***** is seven. Three plus six, that son of a *****
is
> >nine...."
> >His mother heard what he was saying and gasped, "What are you doing?"
> >The little boy answered, "I'm doing my math homework, Mom."
> >"And this is how your teacher taught you to do it?" the mother asked.
> >"Yes," he answered.
> >Infuriated, the mother asked the teacher the next day, "What are you
> >teaching my son in math?"
> >The teacher replied, "Right now, we are learning addition." The mother
> >asked, "And are you teaching them to say two plus two, that son of a
*****
> >is four?"
> >After the teacher stopped laughing, she answered,
> >"What I taught them was, two plus two, THE SUM OF WHICH, is four."
> >