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Thread: lawyer joke?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
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    1,887

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2000
    Location
    Urbandale IA. USA
    Posts
    4,942

    Cool

    Do you know what they call 50 skydiving lawyers?
    Skeet

    Do you know how many lawyers it takes to grease a combine?
    ONE, but you have to run him through real slow....
    Those who dance, appear insane to those who do not hear the music.
    Those who believe, appear ignorant to those who do not know God.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    35 miles from Tunica (casinos)
    Posts
    151
    If a Preist, a School Teacher and a Lawyer are in a boat in shark infested waters. Who will Survive trying to swim to safety?

    The School Teacher can calculate the odds

    The Preist will call on a higher being

    The only one to survive will be the Lawyer

    Why?

    Professional Courtesy

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    SC
    Posts
    20,677
    What do you call a cruise ship full of lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

    A decent start.
    No reserve. No retreat. No regrets.

    For those who have fought for it, freedom has a sweetness the protected will never know.

    http://www.airwarvietnam.com/16thSOSGunners2.jpg

    Proud member of KA Club

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2000
    Location
    Guayaquil EC
    Posts
    10,434

    A Dog Ran Into A Butcher Shop......

    A dog ran into a butcher shop and grabbed a roast off the counter. Fortunately, the butcher recognized the dog as belonging to a neighbor of his. The neighbor happened to be a lawyer.

    Incensed at the theft, the butcher called up his neighbor and said, "Hey, if your dog stole a roast from my butcher shop, would you be liable for the cost of the meat?" The lawyer replied, "Of course, how much was the roast?" "$7.98."

    A few days later the butcher received a check in the mail for $7.98. Attached to it was an invoice that read: Legal Consultation Service: $150.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    977
    What do you call 50,000 lawyers buried up to their armpits in sand?



    Not enough sand.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2000
    Location
    Indiana
    Posts
    318
    Why can't lawyers use Viagra?

    Makes 'em too tall.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    SC
    Posts
    20,677
    How do you know if a lawyer is lying?


    If his lips are moving, he's lying.
    No reserve. No retreat. No regrets.

    For those who have fought for it, freedom has a sweetness the protected will never know.

    http://www.airwarvietnam.com/16thSOSGunners2.jpg

    Proud member of KA Club

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