HVAC tech to homeowner:
“Your furnace has a few problems. But things could be a lot worse.”

Somewhat, relieved, the homeowner replies: “Oh, that’s good news.”

HVAC tech:
“I know. It could be my furnace instead of yours.”

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The best air conditioning man in the world died and went to hell. Satan thought he’d have some fun with him and gave him the impossible job of cooling off the temperature in Satan’s huge office. To Satan’s amazement, he finished the job very quickly. So Satan sent him out to drop the temperature in the rest of hell, and amazingly he got the temperature to drop a few degrees in the rest of hell – just enough to where the inhabitants of hell didn’t mind going there quite as much. One day the phone rang and St. Peter told Satan that there had been a clerical mistake and the AC man belonged in heaven. He’d been sent to hell by mistake, and must be sent back to heaven immediately. Satan refused, explaining that the man was starting to make hell a bit more comfy. St. Peter finally threatened to sue Satan if he didn’t send the man to heaven.

Satan replied: “Where are you going to find a lawyer up there?”

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She calls me when she’s hot
She calls me for no cause
She called me until I told her
The problem was menopause

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Why did the HVAC tech have licenses in different states?

He heard that Freon changes states.

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Why did the AC trainee buy a box of Exlax?

He was told to evacuate the system.