You Might Be A Redneck If

[coyote]

You might be a redneck if you put snow tires on the back of your front wheel drive car.

[scope341]

............If your parents get a new house and you have to help take the wheels off it.

[tomac]

....if you drink beer for breakfast - at 4:00 PM.

[mattm]

........If you don't see anything wrong with these 1st posts.

[rob10]

...if ya pickup women at your family reunion.

[hvt]

......if you have to tell your 16 year old daughter to quit smoking at the dinner table in front of her kids

[hvt]

You might be a redneck if you put snow tires on the back of your front wheel drive car.....

up here we call them Frenchmen!

[so.cal.a/c]

Exept french ladys smell worse.

[nero]

You line up used tires in front of your trailer home, lying horizontally on the lawn used as flower boxes.

[motorboy1]

Originally posted by nero
You line up used tires in front of your trailer home, lying horizontally on the lawn used as flower boxes. I've actually seen those beautiful flower boxes. I think they turn the tires inside out and notch one side all the way around so it looks like tulip sorta when you're done. LOL

[Bassman]

Your family tree looks like a telephone pole.

[mattm]

I still don't see nothing wrong with this stuff.

[bobby7388]

You keep all your appliances on the front porch.

You introduce your wife and sister, and there is only one female next to you.


Your mother cusses out the state trooper because she was caught speeding down the highway with the house again, drunk

Your sister was your prom date.

[grasshopper]

YOU KNOW YOU'RE A REDNECK EDITION 2003:

You take your dog for a walk and you both use the same tree.

You can entertain yourself for more than an hour with a flyswatter.

You burn your yard rather than mow it.

You think the nutcracker is something you did off the high dive.

The salvation army declines your mattress.

You offer to give someone the shirt off your back and they don't want it.

You have the local taxidermist on speed dial.

You come back from the dump with more than you took.

You keep a can of Raid on the kitchen table.

Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.

You've been kicked out of the zoo for heckling the monkeys.

You think a subdivision is part of a math problem.

You've bathed with flea and tick soap.

You've been involved in a custody fight over a hunting dog.

Your kids take a siphon hose to show and tell.

You think a hot tub is a stolen indoor plumbing fixture.

You took a fishing pole to Sea World.

You go to the stock car races and don't need a program.

You know how many bales of hay your car will hold.

You have a rag for a gas cap.

Your father executes the "Pull my finger" trick during Christmas dinner.

Your house doesn't have curtains but your truck does.

You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.

You can spit without opening your mouth.

You consider your license plate personalized because your father made it.

Your lifetime goal is to own a fireworks stand.

You sit on your roof at Christmas time hoping to fill your deer
quota..

You have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say Cool Whip on them.

The biggest city you've ever been to is Walmart.

Your working TV sits on top of your non-working TV.

You thought the Unibomber was a wrestler.

You've used your ironing board as a buffet table.

You think a quarter horse is that ride in front of K-mart.

Your neighbors think you're a detective because a cop always brings
you
home.

You've used a toilet brush as a back scratcher.

You've asked the preacher, "How's it hangin'"

You missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.

You think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 mph.

[scope341]

If your wife asks you ;
Bubba, ifin i was to deevorse you, would i still be ya sister?

[tomac]

Grasshopper; Good ones!!

[joe kuhl]

If your local zoo has the name of the animal in the cage and a recipe.

[rob10]

If you post on this site more than 3 times a day.

[absrbrtek]

you have this URL as your homepage and lerlenes your gurlfrend. http://www.mytrailerpark.com/

[mattm]

Where did you find that? My trailer park is FUNNY!!!!!!!

[absrbrtek]

Someone posted it in a newsgroup a couple of yrs ago. I still crack up reading it.


Originally posted by mattm
Where did you find that? My trailer park is FUNNY!!!!!!!

[scope341]

Sorry,i`ll make a new thread for this, is too good to miss. ;)


Here ya go.. http://hvac-talk.com/vbb/showthread.php?threadid=28473

[Edited by scope341 on 04-10-2003 at 08:08 PM]