Minn. Tourism Dept.

[TB]

The Minnesota Tourism Department

This list of rules will be handed to each person as they enter the state.

1. That slope-shouldered farm boy you are snickering at did more work
before breakfast than you will do all week at the gym. How'd you like to
go home and tell your momma you got your butt kicked by a big guy in bib overalls?

2. It's called a "gravel road." No matter how slow you drive, you're
going to get dust on your BMW. I have a four wheel drive because I need it.
Now drive or get it out of the way.

3. We all started hunting and fishing when we were nine years old. Yeah, we
saw Bambi. We got over it.

4. Any references to "corn fed" when talking about our women will get
your butt kicked...by our women.

5. Pull your pants up, and turn your hat around. You look like an idiot.

6. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of mallards are making their final
approach, we will shoot it. You might hope you don't have it up to your ear at
the time.

7. No, there's no "Vegetarian Special" on the menu. Order steak. Order it rare.
Or, you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the two pounds of ham and turkey.

8. Yeah, we have sweet tea. It comes unsweetened in a glass with two
packets of sugar and a long spoon.

9. You bring Coke into my house, it better be brown, wet, and served over ice.

10. So you have a sixty thousand dollar car. We're real impressed. We have
quarter-million dollar combines that we use two weeks a year.

11. Let's get this straight. We may have one stoplight in town. We stop when
it's red. We may even stop when it's yellow.

12. Our women hunt, fish, and drive trucks-because they want to. So,
you're a feminist. Isn't that cute.

13. Yeah, we eat catfish, Northern, walleye and turtle too. If you
really want sushi and caviar, it's available at the bait shop.

14. They are pigs and cows. That's what they smell like. Get over it. Don't
like it? Interstate 90 & Interstate 94 go two ways....Interstate 35 goes south.
.....get on one of them.

15. The "Opener" refers to the first days of fishing and deer season.
They are religious holidays. You can get breakfast at the church.

16. So what if every person in every pick-up waves? It's called being
friendly. Understand the concept?

17. Yeah, we have golf courses. Don't hit in the water hazards. It
spooks the fish.

[grasshopper]

Ya- right on!
Did you used to live here or what?

[TB]

The e-mail came to me that way. My folks are both from Mn. but as far as I'm concerned, this should apply to the whole Country. Over here, we got idiots building houses next to farmers, who have been there 50 years or more, then sueing them cause they cant handle the smell of the animals...and winning. That disgusts me.

[Mnfatman]

Originally posted by TB
The e-mail came to me that way. My folks are both from Mn. but as far as I'm concerned, this should apply to the whole Country. Over here, we got idiots building houses next to farmers, who have been there 50 years or more, then sueing them cause they cant handle the smell of the animals...and winning. That disgusts me.

Got that happening in I think Dakota county. Last I heard the farmer was going to invest in a bunch of pigs for his farm to harass the neighbors back. Some investors developed some land that borders his farm and those neighbors want him to move.

[grasshopper]

Something like that happened with the sportsmen's club that I belong to. The club has been established and on our own land(something like 56 acres) for over 150 years. Some real estate snob bought the house next door without doing his homework. Got into it with us from the word go. He tried to change his tune and suck up when he found out that we control the land access rights. He wanted to turn his out of the way cabin into a ton of rental homes for the water. He was granted single family dwelling access only, just like the last 100 years. He tried to sue us. The judge asked why we made our decision. We stated that we did not want unregulated comercial traffic, especially families with children on vacation running around our backyard. Since we have 2 shotgun, 1 rifle, 1 pistol, and 2 archery ranges on our property our decision sat with the judge as common sense. He has been fumming/looking for a way to get us back for the embarassment of the judge laughing him out of court when he didn't get it.

[TB]

Thanks, I needed to hear that there is a decent judge somewhere, I would probly offer to buy the land from the guy, for 1/2 what he paid for it, just because. Our rifle club had a developement go in right by it too, but they nipped any problem in the bud, by talking to the folks, and proving the safety of our facility, they even went overboard by adding metal bullet stops at 10' intervals, just above the line of sight (4') just in case someone might shoot above the target stop. So far the community isn't causing a problem though.

It is my hope, and prayer, that in the light of the problems with terrorism and the taliban, we, as a nation, will finally stop letting people who are stupid on purpose, push us arround.

[Edited by TB on 01-23-2002 at 12:58 AM]